I recently read Project 333 by Courtney Carver. Her proposition is simple: create a capsule wardrobe from 33 items to help eliminate stress and gain more from life by living with less.

For Carver, receiving an MS diagnosis was her wake up call that something about her lifestyle needed to change. So she went about trying to simplify her life by simplifying her stuff, and came up with the idea of her Project 333 challenge.

This isn’t the first book about minimalism that has completely drew me in, hook, line and sinker. A few years ago, I read Goodbye, things by Fumio Sasaki and his way of thinking just made So. Much. Sense.

But take one look into my closet and anyone can see I’m not a minimalist. I love a good spring clean, I’m not sentimental about clothing and I’m definitely good at clearing stuff out, but the amount of stuff I actually own? Hmmm.

The allure of minimalism for me?

Less stuff. More space. Less clutter. More time. Less stress. More gratitude. Keeping only the things you love. Letting go of the rest and the burden that inevitably comes with it.

And even I know there is a burden that comes with owning too much stuff. The more I own, the more I have to worry about. The less distractions, the more room there is to pursue the things I love.

It goes a bit further for me too: less shopping for stuff I don’t need equals more money to save. More money to save equals more money to spend on things that actually matter to me, like experiences. More experiences equals more satisfaction from my life in general.

And yet, shopping is a crutch I’ve fallen on way too many times, and still do. I’ve shopped away the pain, shopped away the boredom, shopped because I had an upcoming event, or because I had an upsetting one. Shopped because the sun was out and my mood had lifted, or because the rain came back and I needed my mood to lift.

But shopping as a way of dulling unwanted emotions or enhancing positive ones, can only last so long. And the few minutes (seconds?) of retail therapy endorphins disappear as soon as the regret of spending more shows up. Uggh.

I’m not a minimalist — yet. But I’m trying to adopt a minimalist mindset anyway.

For now, that means reassessing my wardrobe and trying to eliminate stuff that no longer sparks joy. It also means keeping less in my (main) closet, so that I can see and feel the space between the hangers, and have less decisions about what to wear each day.

I’m also trying to be more mindful about shopping — yes, any kind of shopping, op shopping included.

I’m not a minimalist now, but you never know, one day I might be the one to write a book on how I became one.

But I first need to learn how to actually be one.

Let the journey begin.